STUFFED Part 1- CATALYST YOUTH, November 23, 2018

Today is Black Friday. While we get together tonight, there are crowds of people fighting over the last Nintendo Switch and honking furiously in parking lots! Today is a great day to talk about STUFF. In this first part of our series, we're talking about CONTENTMENT, and next week we'll be focusing on GENEROSITY.

Being content means to be satisfied. To be happy with what you have. Have you ever met someone who is content? It's a pretty rare thing these days. ESPECIALLY on Black Friday! The reason why contentment is so rare, is that we live in a culture that is constantly telling us NOT TO BE CONTENT. Think about it—we’re SURROUNDED by advertising online, in magazines, at the mall, and on TV that tell us that we can’t be happy unless we have what they’re selling. 

In fact—do you know what corporations call us? They call us CONSUMERS! Have you ever thought about that word and what it implies? A consumer is a mindless machine that constantly consumes. It eats, and eats, and wants more and more, and is NEVER satisfied! Companies invest millions of dollars to market their products and brands as something that's "cool", so you'll be lining up to get their stuff. They love it when you wear their logos on your clothes! They love it when you upgrade to something newer! Why? Because they are making money off of you. Billions of dollars off of you! They don’t want you to be happy with what you have--- they want you to buy their stuff…and once you have it, they want you to buy more stuff they’re selling!

Our culture, loves stuff so much that CBC NEWS recently reported that on average, Canadians now owe $1.70 for every $1 they earn--- that means that people spend about 3/4 more than they make! So if you made $10,000, you would spend $17,000! Even kids know that this isn't a very smart thing to do. Eventually, people start owing so much and getting so far in debt, that they feel hopeless. In fact, the #1 reason why couples fight and families get broken up is because of financial stress. It happens because most people have bad spending habits and owe so much that they’re constantly worried about how they’re going to pay for essential things like food and having a roof over their head!

Our culture loves stuff so much, that UNBOXING videos get MILLIONS of views- so many views that people can earn a living off of opening packages! That sounds like a pretty cool job, but it’s totally crazy that we’re all so obsessed with watching people unwrap stuff! This kind of thing just makes us want stuff more and more. The more we look at stuff, the more we think about stuff, the more we want it! Our love for stuff can make us go a bit crazy! Have you ever been in a store with a huge sale during Black Friday? It’s like war! People will actually push and shove to get stuff--- and sometimes they don’t even really want the stuff--- they just want it because OTHER people want it! A mob mentality takes over!

While there’s nothing wrong with liking stuff and wanting stuff and there’s nothing wrong with having a Christmas wish list (I have a Christmas wish list!)---the Bible DOES warn us about becoming obsessed with stuff, it warns us about not letting our happiness depend on what we have. If you’re sad, angry or depressed because you don’t have something you want or because you want what someone else has, then that’s a problem. So tonight, we’re just going to check out a bit of wisdom from the Bible about STUFF.

1. STUFF NEVER SATISFIES

Some of the Bible was written by a guy named King Solomon. King Solomon was kind of like the Donald Trump of the Bible (political views aside). He was the King of Israel, so he had fame and power, and along with that, he was SUPER RICH…but surprisingly, that’s not what he’s most famous for. He’s most famous because he asked God to give him wisdom, so that he could be the best leader for his people, and there are a few books of the Old Testament that are full of his wise sayings and advice.

In Ecclesiastes 5:10, he says, “Those who love money (or what money can buy) WILL NEVER HAVE ENOUGH. How meaningless to think that wealth brings true happiness.”

Have you ever heard of the phrase, “money can’t buy happiness”--- well that came from King Solomon, the richest guy on the planet!

Have you ever WANTED something REALLY BAD--- where you felt that you just WOULDN’T be happy without it? Where all you could do was think about getting that thing? How many of those things are gathering dust on your shelf today, or ended up getting tossed in the garbage, or donated? Probably a fair bit. People grow tired of toys. That electronic device that you so desperately want will be out-dated next year and you'll be wanting the next upgrade. The clothing or brand you want now will wear out or go out of style. The video game you want now will be sitting in a stack of unplayed games in a few weeks.

Areally good tip to remember is that where there’s something that you REALLY want—remind yourself that it’s just stuff--- and that it won’t actually make you content. That you might be a happy for a bit, but eventually that happiness will wear off, and you’ll be looking for something else to make you happy!

Jesus said in Luke 12:15, “Watch out! Be on your guard against wanting to have more and more things. Life is not made up of how much a person has.”

Jesus says that we should BE ON OUR GUARD against wanting more and more things. We need to make sure we don’t get sucked into believing that stuff will make us truly happy--- that if we finally get_________ we’ll be done wanting anything else. That’s just not reality. We are, kind of, naturally, CONSUMERS—but Jesus is reminding us that there’s more to life than just consuming more and more for yourself.

2. REALIZE HOW RICH YOU ARE!

Would you say that you and your family are RICH? You might not think so, but we are considered to be some of the richest people in the world! In fact, if you make $24,000 a year (that’s like $500 a week- which is less than minimum wage and is pretty much impossible to live on in Canada), you are in the richest 8% of the world’s population and make 14 times the global average! (givingwhatwecan.org) 

My wife and I try to live pretty simply. We're been debt-free for 12 years, and we want to keep it that way. We rent a two-bedroom apartment, so with two kids and two adults, it can get a bit cramped, but we live simply because we don't want to spend more than we make and we want to have a parent at home while the kids are still little. We are kind of odd-balls in our culture. Most of my kids’ friends have parents who both work all day and might spend an hour or two with their kids before putting them to bed every day.  Tanya and I aren't like the average Canadians. We rarely meet anybody who doesn't have any debt.

There are days when we think about UPGRADING from our apartment into a house--- but whenever we think about how nice it would be to have more space, we think about how it would cost more. We would have to deal with repairs and upkeep, we would both have to be working and would spend less time with the kids. We also think about how our sponsored child in Africa lives in a hut with no windows---how a grocery store is like something out of her dreams---and that in comparison--- my little 2-bedroom apartment is a PALACE to most people in the world! My fridge full of food is a huge luxury!

When I think about how rich I actually am, how blessed I am to have what I have, it changes my perspective. I find that it helps me not to want something just because others have it. It reminds me to be thankful and content with what I have instead of always wishing for more!

Remember our wise guy, Solomon? Well, in Ecclesiastes 6:9 he wrote, “Enjoy what you have rather than desiring what you don’t have. Just dreaming about nice things is meaningless—like chasing the wind.”  The richest guy in the world said that dreaming about nice things is like chasing the wind! You’ll never be happy! You’ll never be satisfied! You’ll never be able to catch it! He reminds us to ENJOY WHAT WE HAVE INSTEAD OF DESIRING WHAT WE DON’T HAVE! That’s a really challenging lesson to learn!

3. WE NEED GOD TO HELP US FIND CONTENTMENT

Sometimes, people look to things or circumstances to make them happy, sometimes they even look to a relationship to make them happy!

There was this famous French mathematician named Blaise Paschal in the 1600’s--- and he famously said that in every person there is a GOD-SHAPED hole. So basically, we all have a need to know and follow God--- and when we try to fill that hole with other things, it’ll never be satisfied! Our spiritual need won’t be satisfied with stuff, it won’t be satisfied with a girlfriend or boyfriend, it won’t be satisfied with money or fame… it’ll only be satisfied in God!

In the Bible, Paul wrote a lot about contentment--- and his life wasn’t all that great. He had been beaten up and thrown in prison for telling people about Jesus--- but in a letter he wrote, he had this to say, “I have learned to be content no matter what happens to me. I know what it’s like not to have what I need. I also know what it’s like to have more than I need. I have learned the secret of being content no matter what happens. I am content whether I am well fed or hungry. I am content whether I have more than enough or not enough. I can do all this by the power of Christ. He gives me strength”.- Phillipians 4:11-13

Paul needed God’s help and strength to be content—to be thankful—to be happy, even when things weren’t going all that great for him! In the same way, because we live in a culture that’s obsessed with stuff and treats us like CONSUMERS, we need God’s help so that we don’t end up becoming greedy people who just want more and more and never find any satisfaction.

When we know and follow Jesus, he can help us to make wise choices in life, he can help change our priorities so that we’re not as selfish as we used to be, he can help us find contentment and happiness in a world that constantly tells us not to be happy and content.

DISCUSSION

1. Have your kids look around their room at stuff that they used to really want but never play or use anymore. Why do we keep it? Why are we attached to it? Why do you think we love possessions so much? Our culture is obsessed with stuff. In fact, some people even run out of room and have to rent a place to store all their stuff! Think about things that could be donated or given away to someone who could use them.

2. Take a look at some commercials on TV or online. What is the message that all of those ads give us? (That we can't live without their stuff, that it'll make us happy, that we'll be popular or successful if we have it). Remind your teen that while stuff is good, it'll never actually make us happy. It'll always leave us wanting for more.

3. Take the time to pray together and ask God to help you and your family not to obsess over stuff and getting more stuff. Thank God for all that you have and how blessed you are! 

ANGER MANAGEMENT PART 2- CATALYST YOUTH- November 9, 2018

Last week we started our two-part series called ANGER MANAGEMENT by talking about a guy who's super power is to turn into a monster whenever he get's angry. The Incredible Hulk is the only superhero I'm aware of who HATES his power and is constantly looking for a cure. Why? He doesn't like losing control? He doesn't like hurting people. He doesn't like becoming a monster. All of us can relate a bit to the Hulk, because we've all lost our tempers and said and done things that have got us into trouble or said something that we really regret when we were angry.

While last week we looked at the DARK SIDE of anger and the importance of controlling our tempers, this week, we focused on the GOOD SIDE of anger. Ephesians 4:26 reminds us "In your anger, do not sin". Did you know that anger isn't a bad thing? It's really what we say or do WITH our anger that matters. In fact, anger can actually be a REALLY good thing!

1. GOD GETS ANGRY

There are some people who have this picture of God ALWAYS being angry with people, but that's not true. The Bible does tell us, however, that God HATES evil. He's angry when he sees people making choices that hurt or mistreat others. Anytime we see cases where God brings judgement on people in the Bible, it's a response to serious depravity and evil, not because he likes to punish people for fun.

In Matthew 21:12-13 we read about how Jesus made a whip out of cords, overturned tables, and threw a bunch of people out of the temple. While some think this is a moment where Jesus lost control and "Hulked out", Jesus wasn't beating or abusing people here. In reality, the people he drove out of the temple were ripping people off and taking advantage of the poor. Jesus was standing up against injustice. He told them, "My house will be called a house of prayer, but you are making it a den of robbers!"

In Matthew 18:6, Jesus had some pretty harsh words for people who hurt, mislead, or abuse children. He told the crowd, "It would be better for that person to have a large millstone hung around their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea". This reminds us that God is angry when children are being mistreated and abused! God hates bullying!

Those kinds of things should make US angry too. When we see terrorism or violence on the news, that should make us angry. When we see someone being bullied or made fun of, that should make us angry. When we learn about people who don't have access to clean water or have enough food to feed their families, that should make us angry! It's ok to be angry about the things that God is angry about.

2. ANGER SHOULD NEVER ATTACK SOMEONE ELSE

If you're attacking someone else in your anger, then you're doing it wrong. Even if you think they might deserve it. Our culture today has a real problem with anger and mean-ness. Just hop on social media and you'll see what I mean. There are people receiving vile messages and death threats just because they made a movie that someone didn't like! The popular thing to do these days is to hate Donald Trump. I hear kids and teens every week saying things like they wish Trump would drop dead. And I'm in Canada. Despite what someone has done or how much you feel they deserve it, our anger should NEVER lead us to ridicule others. It should never lead us to get revenge. It should never lead us to sin. By the way, revenge is different than justice. It's ok to want (and help) a bully get punished for what they've done (and hopefully stop bullying because of it). It's quite another thing to gossip about that person or want to hurt them back.

In Matthew 5:22 Jesus says, "But I say, if you are even angry with someone, you are subject to judgment! If you call someone an idiot, you are in danger of being brought before the court. And if you curse someone, you are in danger of the fires of hell".

This reminds us that God takes the way we treat others REALLY seriously.

3. ANGER SHOULD PROPEL US TO DO GOOD

Psalm 82:3-4 says, "Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed. Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked."

Anger should inspire us to help people or to bring about some kind of positive change in our world! If you see someone being bullied or mistreated, you should stand up for them and help ensure that it doesn't keep happening! If you're passionate about animals being abused or mistreated, you might give money towards an organization that rescues animals and finds them a home! If homelessness makes you angry, you might prepare a meal or bake cookies to give to a shelter. One of the reasons why we have an offering at CATALYST is so that we can respond to our anger in a way that helps others! Last year, our teens were most passionate about providing emergency water to families in need.

I shared with the teens about Bob Goff. (That's him taking the selfie above). Bob wrote a book called "EVERYBODY, ALWAYS." that I HIGHLY recommend. Bob is like Indiana Jones! God uses him to do some AMAZING things. I won't spoil anything-- but Bob was angry about some evil and injustice that was happening in Uganda...and his anger led him to save HUNDREDS of lives and to bring evil people to justice. We can't all be Bob Goffs. Some of our teens don't have the money or resources to give in the ways that they would like to, but ALL of us can take our anger over evil, injustice, poverty, bullying etc... and use it to make a positive difference. One example is when we go to the Capital City Mission every year to serve cookies and sandwiches to people who don't have family or are homeless. Another example would be to donate a few cans of food to FAMSAC or to bring a couple of bucks for our youth offering. When you practice doing positive things with your anger NOW, you'll find that when you're older and have money and a career, you'll be doing the same kind of thing on a much LARGER scale! Anger should propel us to do good.

DISCUSSION FOR HOME

1. Talk about some things that are happening in our world that makes your teen (or your family) GOOD AND ANGRY? What are some needs that you're passionate about?

2. This Christmas, challenges yourselves to do something to make a difference as a response to your anger. One thing our family does is that every year, we let our kids choose a gift in the World Vision Gift Catalogue. We'll get those gifts (everything from providing a family with a stove to buying chickens for someone to start a farm) and even make Christmas ornaments on our tree that represent those gifts. If you don't have the money to give, think about how you can volunteer as a family.

3. Pray that God would help us when we're angry-- that we would respond in ways that are wise and in ways that don't hurt others. Pray that God would help us to be people who take our anger and do something positive with it.

CONNECT DEVOTIONAL- HOW CAN I HELP MY CHURCH BE MORE WELCOMING?

In all of our CONNECT groups this month, we looked at Luke 19:1-10. In this passage, we're introduced to a man named Zacchaeus. Zacchaeus was a tax collector who had become very rich. He was also someone who wanted to get a glimpse of Jesus, but he was too short to see over the crowds that were surrounding him. So, Zacchaeus decided to climb a tree and wait for Jesus to pass his way. The Bible tells us that when Jesus came by, he looked up and called Zacchaeus by name, inviting himself over to his house (I love the brashness of this!). 

Verse 6 says, "Zacchaeus quickly climbed down and took Jesus to his house in great excitement and joy", however some people grumbled and complained because Jesus was hanging out with someone who was considered a "notorious sinner". The thing that happened next is quite surprising. Zacchaeus told Jesus that he would give half of his wealth to the poor and for those he had cheated on their taxes, he would pay them back four times the amount he had taken! Jesus then announces that salvation had come to Zacchaeus' house!

Jesus does something incredible simple here. He called Zacchaeus by name and he expressed a desire to hang out with him. That's it. Because of something so simple, Zacchaeus accepted God's love and forgiveness and was inspired to change his whole life! 

We all want to be accepted. Most of us will choose a church community based on how welcome we feel and how positive the experience is. While Jesus did something very simple in this passage, for a lot of us, extending friendship to others is a lot easier said than done. It's not something that comes naturally to everyone. In fact, there are a number of reasons why we naturally DON'T want to help our church be more welcoming (even if we might not admit it). There are a number of things that dissuade us from being friendly and welcoming to those we don't know (or don't know that well):

• You're an introvert. It's hard for you to talk to others.
• You've got social anxiety, so it creates a lot of stress and discomfort.
• You're not a great conversationalist. The idea of making small talk might be terrifying. What do you do if there's a lull in the conversation?
• It's safer to stick to your own circle of friends. Because it's easier to talk to people you already know, you tend to naturally gravitate towards those same people. The downside to this is you might form a clique where people outside your group don't feel welcome or accepted.
• You just don't want to.
• You've met the person before but can't remember their name.
• You're selfish. You don't care if others get connected or feel welcome.
• Fear of rejection. How might they respond?
• Low self-esteem or other insecurities. You might feel that nobody would want to talk to you.
• Fear of the unknown.
• You assume that somebody else will do it. The problem with this is that others might be thinking the same thing and the person ends up falling through the cracks.
• The person seems to want to keep to themselves or appears antisocial.
• You're super popular. You might have a lot of people gathering around you to talk to you and you don't want to be rude and leave them to say hi to someone else.
• You always sit in the same spot at church or you're at the opposite end of the room, so there's no opportunity.
• You don't want to scare people away from church because of an awkward/bad conversation.
• You're too busy. Sometimes you just want to get from point A to point B and so you never allow an opportunity to stop and engage with someone else. You can even be busy doing really good or important things.
• They might look strange/odd. Perhaps they even have a disability and you're not sure how to talk to someone who is different?

There are a lot of reasons why we might not be as friendly and welcoming to others as we could be. In this Bible passage, Jesus was the popular one. He was surrounded by huge crowds who wanted his attention. Meanwhile, Zacchaeus was on the outside, and was a little odd. After all, he was a grown man sitting in a tree. Nowadays, you might call 911 or cross to the other side of the street if you noticed a businessman sitting in a tree! Zacchaeus was also hated by a lot of the Jewish people because he would take taxes from them and give it to the Roman government (their oppressors). He was also regarded as a thief because tax collectors would often over-charge people to take some of their money for themselves. Because of these things, Zacchaeus was considered a big-time sinner, and even the religious leaders told people to stay away from people like him. 

There were a lot of reasons why Jesus COULD have passed Zacchaeus by without noticing or acknowledging him. Jesus was surrounded by other people who wanted his time and attention, and Jesus was busy healing the sick and teaching people about God. But here, we find Jesus noticing the person who was on the outside and taking a simple step of friendship that ended up changing this guy's life and heart!

This passage really challenges us to get over our legit fears, to get over that feeling of discomfort we all feel for a variety of reasons, and to do what we can to be friendly and welcoming to people who might be new to our church or feel like they're on the outside.

None of us want to see people fall through the cracks. We don't want anyone to leave our church feeling that it's full of cliques or that nobody would miss them if they never returned. Taking that step to extend friendship might make somebody feel welcomed and at home in our church! It might open up an opportunity for them to learn and grow deeper in their faith! It might contribute to a greater feeling of community and belonging!

4 TIPS ON HOW TO HELP OUR CHURCH BE MORE WELCOMING: 

Here are just a few tips that can spur us on towards being Jesus to the Zacchaeus' around us.

1. NOTICE PEOPLE

Jesus noticed Zacchaeus WHEN HE WAS IN A TREE! He probably would have been awesome at games like ‘Where’s Waldo’! When you’re at church or at a church event, look for people you don’t know, watch for people who might be alone, keep your eyes open for people who might be new. Jesus was surrounded by crowds who wanted his attention, and yet Jesus noticed the man who was sitting in a tree.

2. PUSH PAST THE FEAR

I know this is sometimes easier said than done, but you can try to find ways to make this easier for you. Try jotting down people's names when you meet them so that you can remember them. Think ahead of some conversation starters/ice-breakers. Take someone else along with you to say hi to someone. Serve in an area of the church that creates opportunities for you to be friendly and welcoming to new people. If you've met someone a couple of times and see them again, invite them to sit with you! Instead of having to carry the conversation on your own, bring that person and introduce them to others you know!

3. ASK GOD TO HELP YOU.

Tell God that you’re WILLING to be friendly and welcoming to others and ask God to open up doors of opportunity for you to do that! Praying this way means that you're being strategic and intentional. You're telling God that you've made yourself available and you'll be more focused on looking for new people to welcome.

4. THINK OF THE POSSIBILITIES!

When you’re tempted to chicken out, think about what it’s like when you're in a new place and don’t really know anybody. How much you would love for someone to say hi and introduce you to their circle of friends? How much would you love for someone to ask you to sit with them? Think about how because Jesus simply noticed and extending friendship to Zacchaeus, his whole life was changed! You never know how God could use you! On the other hand, if someone is ignored and leaves feeling that nobody would miss them, then we're falling short in our mission to love God and others.

ANGER MANAGEMENT PART 1- CATALYST YOUTH- November 2, 2018

This week at CATALYST we kicked off a new two-part series called ANGER MANAGEMENT.

We talked about Bruce Banner (aka The Incredible Hulk). Unlike most superheroes, Bruce hates becoming the Hulk and is always actively trying to find a way for him to be cured and to get rid of his abilities. The reason for this isn't because his annual clothing bill is so huge (because of all the ripped pants), but because when he becomes the Hulk, he loses control and does a lot of things that he regrets later. The Hulk hurts people. The Hulk scares people. For Bruce, the Hulk really is a monster! So, until Bruce finds a cure, he is constantly looking for ways to prevent the Hulk from showing up. He even moves away from everybody he loves and lives in solitude, because he doesn't want anybody to get hurt!

I think that EVERY SINGLE PERSON on the planet can relate to the Incredible Hulk a little bit. Everybody can relate to saying or doing something in the heat of the moment and looking back with regret…recognizing that you said or did something wrong, or that you hurt somebody in some way. This week in our series, we're looking at why ANGER is such a bad thing. (Next week, we'll look at how ANGER can be a GOOD thing!). Whether Anger is good or bad depends on what we do with it. And usually, when we get angry, we naturally burst out and say and do things that God wouldn't be very proud of. It’s kind of tough to control our anger because our natural response is that if someone says or does something mean to us, it’s all about REVENGE, getting payback, hurting them in the same way they hurt us.

1. ANGER WILL GET YOU INTO TROUBLE

Proverbs 19:19 says, “Hot tempered people must pay the penalty. If you rescue them once, you will have to do it again”.

Has anger ever gotten you in trouble? Most people who are in jail because of fighting or committing violent crimes against other people, aren't there because they were happy and chill at the time- it's usually because they did something foolish when they were angry or wanted revenge. Almost all of us have gotten in trouble with our parents because of something we said or did while angry. When we get punished during those times, it's because our parents want us to learn how to respond in healthy ways so that we don't turn out to be 30-year-olds who stomp our feet, scream at the top of our lungs, and slam doors. We usually get in trouble when we don't control our anger.

2. ANGER CAN WRECK YOUR REPUTATION

I shared a story about a guy I used to work with at Canadian Tire who would always get angry REALLY easily. During my time working there, I saw him punch walls, throw things, and even pick fights with customers. As entertaining as that was, it was also SUPER stressful. I didn't like working with him because he had such a crazy temper. He acted like a kid throwing a temper tantrum!

Proverbs 29:11 (NLT) says, “FOOLS VENT THEIR ANGER”.

Ecclesiastes 7:9 (NLT) says, “Control your temper, for anger labels you a fool”.

Did you catch the key word there? If you don’t control your anger, you’re the one who’s going to look bad. It'll affect how others think of you!

3. ANGER USUALLY HURTS PEOPLE

Proverbs 27:4 says, “Anger is cruel, and wrath is like a flood”.

I really like what the Bible says there…comparing wrath to a FLOOD. What do people do when there’s a flood? THEY EVACUATE! It makes sense that hot-tempered people have others EVACUATING from their lives. Cruel people aren’t going to be surrounded by friends. People who lash out and abuse the people around them shouldn’t be surprised when their “loved ones” have to escape the danger zone…sometimes for good! 

Hebrews 12:14-15 says, “Work at living in peace with everyone…Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many”.

Do you know what it means to be bitter or what “bitterness” is? It means that you hold a grudge against someone and refuse to let it go. I’ve met people who NEVER speak to family members because they were hurt by something that was done to them years ago. And usually those people are super grumpy and unhappy because they have so much anger in their hearts. They’re just letting it stew inside!

Almost always, people who can’t control their temper will end up hurting the people around them!

SO HOW DO WE DEAL WITH THE BIG GREEN MONSTER?

A) LOOK TO GOD FOR HELP

In Galatians 5:22, Paul lists what he calls “the fruit of the spirit”. These things are the RESULTS that come from being close to God and growing in your faith. So just like a tree grows fruit, if you love and follow Jesus, if you’re a part of church or CATALYST regularly, if you read the Bible and think about what it says, if you pray and ask God to help you, you’ll see these things start GROW in your life! You’re going to see yourself changing for the better! It’s pretty cool!

“The Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: (these kinds of things grow IN US, as we grow in our faith) LOVE, joy, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS, GOODNESS, faithfulness, GENTLENESS, and SELF CONTROL”

Just look at that list—a lot of those things are the COMPLETE opposite of anger! When you’re frustrated, God will help you have more peace and patience, when you’re annoyed at someone, you’ll have more love and kindness. When you normally would explode on someone and unleash your wrath, you’ll be more self-controlled and respond with GENTLENESS.

Those things are a huge benefit when you follow Jesus with your life! God will keep fixing you up and changing you into the best version of yourself! In fact, that’s one way you can tell that you’ve got good spiritual health—when you notice those good changes more and more in your life! It's kind of like fixing up an old house. When you invite Jesus into your life, the Holy Spirit starts renovating you—he fixes stuff that’s broken, he gives things a new coat of paint, and years later, you’ll see a ton of improvements!

B) USE YOUR HEAD!

Proverbs 29:11 says, “A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control”. 

Proverbs 12:16 says, “A fool is quick-tempered, but a wise person stays calm when insulted”.

Here, the Bible is telling us to use our heads…instead of automatically BLOWING UP when something goes wrong or when somebody offends us…we should think about what the best and wisest response might be. Some people will give themselves some time to cool off so that they don't say or do something they would regret when they're angry.  I’ve heard of some people who will write a BRUTAL letter expressing all of their anger, and then hold onto it for a few days…and usually by then, their anger isn’t as intense and they’re glad they didn’t say those things to that person’s face. (Just don’t put the letter in an envelope and put a stamp on it—because I think I’ve seen movies where that kind of thing gets mailed, and then you have to break into the person’s house to try to steal it back…and that usually doesn’t go so well.)

James 1:19-20, “Take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life (right living) that God desires”.

Talk about practical advice! We’re encouraged not to have emotional outbursts and immediately react when we’re offended, but to take a breather—to be SLOW to become angry—to be SLOW to speak and say things that we’ll regret later! The Bible says that wise people are self-controlled and think before they say or do something they’ll regret

C) MAKE THINGS RIGHT 

There are times when it’s too late...we blow up, we hulk out, and we’ve left a path of destruction behind us….perhaps we’ve even created some enemies? And while the easy thing to do would be to walk away, ignore the problem and not deal with our sin, the Bible tells us that in those instances we have to suck up our pride, admit our mistakes, and be quick to make things right. THAT IS SUPER HARD TO DO, but it’s also SUPER HEALTHY to do!

Ephesians 4:26-27 (NLT) says, “Don’t sin by letting anger control you. Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil”.

Here, the Bible says that if we’ve let anger control us, we need to make things right BEFORE THE SUN GOES DOWN! It’s important for us to apologize when we’ve hurt people and ask them to forgive us! It’s important that we tell God that we’re sorry for the things we’ve said and done and ask him to forgive us! Have you ever been in the same room with someone you’re angry with? It can be super awkward. It almost feels like there’s a wall between you—sometimes you won’t even look at them or talk to them! Well, God wants us to work at fixing broken relationships—he wants us to tear those walls down and own our mistakes—to apologize for our part--- and when we do that, it usually is the first step in repairing the relationship and it usually removes that heavy feeling in the room.

Ephesians 4:31-32 says, “Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words and slander, as well as all types of evil behaviour. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you”. When we pray and ask God to forgive us for our sin (something wrong that we’ve done) it fixes our friendship with him. In the same way, when we forgive others (or ask other people to forgive us), it fixes our friendship with them too!

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS FOR HOME

1. What is the one thing parents do that makes teenagers really angry? What is the one thing teens do that makes parents really angry? Talk about how you can prevent those situations from happening or how to respond in healthy ways. What is something that you could do to help you not respond in those ways?

2. Pray and ask God to help you to control your anger so that it doesn't hurt yourself and others.

BACK 2 SCHOOL SURVIVAL GUIDE PART 3- Friday, October 19, 2018

This week, we continued our series, "BACK 2 SCHOOL SURVIVAL GUIDE", by focusing on some tips for how to handle stress. A lot of students say that they deal with a lot of stress, but stress doesn't magically disappear when you get older! In fact, you start having to deal with adult problems (like providing for your family, dealing with car or house repairs). Because we'll always have stress in life, it's really important to learn how to manage it in healthy ways. These are some tips that can be a real help to you in school and beyond.

1. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF

When I was in college, I remember that there were times where we pulled all-nighters, studying for a big exam or test or trying to finish an assignment on time. Students would consume mass quantities of energy drinks or coffee to help them stay awake, they would eat late-night fast food to keep them going, and they would inevitably end up looking like zombies in the morning. Well, as it turns out… all of those things don’t help you! If you read any article about how to deal with stress, they usually all say the same things--- put away your electronic devices at night, eat healthy food, get exercise, avoid drugs or alcohol, and get enough sleep!

In fact—there’s even this REALLY cool time in the Bible where Elijah was REALLY stressed out, and it wasn’t because he had piles of homework…he actually had his life threatened and was being hunted down by soldiers because he was telling people to turn from sin and follow God. Well things got pretty dark for Elijah…so dark that he actually prayed that God would take his life so that he could get some peace… and then 1 Kings 19:5-7 says, “Then he lay down and slept under the tree. But as he was sleeping, an angel touched him and told him, “Get up and eat!” He looked around and there beside his head was some bread baked on hot stones and a jar of water! So he ate and drank and lay down again. Then the angel of the Lord came again and touched him and said, “Get up and eat some more, or the journey ahead will be too much for you.”

This is just amazing. An angel actually hung out with Elijah and made sure that he got enough rest, food and water. The angel even baked him fresh bread! Taking care of yourself is really important!

2. DON’T WORRY

Most of you have heard my story about worry--- I was someone who was LITERALLY sick and had all kinds of crazy medical tests done on me when I was teen because I kept worrying about stuff, and ultimately, the thing that really helped me was reading Matthew 6:27 where it says, “Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?”. I had never thought about that before….but when you worry about something, all it does is keep you focused on that thing that you’re worried about it, and then you just keep worrying about it more and more! But here, Jesus says that WORRYING about stuff doesn’t actually help you! The problem won’t magically go away because you worry about it! It’ll actually just make it seem even bigger and get you more stressed!

3. DON’T PROCRASTINATE

The longer you leave important things, the more stress you'll experience. This is a lesson that I really didn’t learn until college. When I was in college, I made a decision to use my time wisely—that instead of FIRST hanging out with my friends and relaxing, I decided to get stuff done earlier than I had to. If I had study periods or spares, I used those opportunities to get work done! It really drove my friends crazy when they were freaking out because they had left things to the last minute, and I was all relaxed and had spare time because I had finished those assignments days or weeks before they were due.

4. GET SOME SUPPORT

If you’re feeling stressed, it’s important that you have people in your life who can really help and encourage you! Talk to your parents about what you’re dealing with! Surround yourselves with friends who have your back and who are looking out for you!  One of the worst things is to be surrounded by “friends” who actually encourage you to leave stuff until the last minute or who influence you in negative ways--- one of the great things about having Christian friends is that God can use them to be a real help and support to you when you need it the most! I shared about how much I appreciate my wife, Tanya, because there are a lot of times when I’ve been worried about stuff or didn’t know how to best handle a situation and she has always been there to pray for me, to give me wise advice, or to remind me about what the Bible has to say about a situation! That’s the kind of person you want in your corner!

Another way you can surround yourself with support is to know when you need extra help dealing with stuff. Talking to a doctor or seeing a counsellor to help you better handle stress is definitely nothing to be ashamed of. I used to think that NOBODY did that kind of thing because growing up, nobody ever talked about it, but these days, it’s talked about way more openly and I know SO MANY people who get regular counselling or medical help!

5. FIND PEACE & REST IN JESUS

In Matthew 11:28-29, Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light”.

Here, Jesus saying that if we’ve had our sins forgiven and have invited Jesus into our lives--- if we have a friendship with God---we can find peace and rest IN HIM! One of the reasons why I love being a part of CATALYST or being a part of church on Sundays is because it means I’m setting aside specific time to focus on Jesus instead of the stuff I’m worried or stressed about. I’m taking time to invest in my SPIRITUAL health!

In particular, for me, I love getting together and singing worship songs to God! The songs that we sing are full of Bible verses or truths about God and how much he loves us! They shift my focus off of all the stuff I might be worrying about--- and I find that even after a few songs, it feels like my BATTERIES have been recharged! I really feel more rested and less overwhelmed about stuff when I’m spending time with Jesus!

In Phillipians 4:6-7 it says, “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand.”.

Here, the Bible is telling us that when we’re stressed, when we’re worried about stuff….when we’re looking for peace and rest, we should talk to God about it--- we should ask him for help….and that, when we do, he’ll even give us a SUPERNATURAL peace!  There’ve been times in my life where I’ve gone through stressful situations, and I’ve had people ask me, “Why aren’t you freaking out right now? How are you handling this so well?”—and the answer is because I have Jesus in my life helping me and giving me the strength to get through—I’m not carrying the heavy burden all by myself! I can experience peace in situations that would normally have me losing my hair!

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS FOR HOME

1. Talk to your teen about things in their lives that are stressful for them.

2. What are one or two tips that Pastor Ben shared that your teen thinks would REALLY help them better manage their stress?

3. Share a time when you've experienced the peace and rest that Jesus gives in the midst of a stressful situation.

4. Take some time to pray for your teen. Encourage them to come to you when they're stressed or are having a hard time dealing with things. Encourage them to take care of themselves physically and spiritually, so they will be better equipped to handle stress.

BACK 2 SCHOOL SURVIVAL GUIDE PART 2- Friday, October 12, 2018

After a few unexpected weeks off because our church was hit by a tornado (crazy, right?), this week we continued our series, "BACK 2 SCHOOL SURVIVAL GUIDE" by talking about work. Most teens dread school because there's a lot of stress and they have to do tons of homework, projects, essays and exams that are sometimes worth 30% of their grade. For some of our teens, they might be working at their very first part-time job (or they will be soon), so this week we focused on what the Bible has to say about the way that we do our work.

We focused on Joseph's story and read Genesis 39:1-6. Here we find Joseph doing a job that he hated. Why? Because he was actually sold into slavery and forced to do it! This wasn't what he wanted to do! But what's amazing is that Joseph is known as someone who did his very best and worked hard, and because of that, he succeeded in everything that he did.

There might be some days when your teen might REALLY hate doing chores around the house, when they have to do piles of homework or spend hours studying for a test when they would much rather play video games or watch Netflix. There might be days when your teen might even have a "dirty job" and has to do work that he/she doesn't enjoy. In fact, your teen might be tempted to grumble and complain or not do their best. Well, the Bible reminds us of a few important things that might help:

1. GOD IS WITH YOU WHEN YOU WORK
This passage reminds us that God was with Joseph, helping him, changing his attitude, giving him the strength to do the job that he hated doing. When you're facing stress over school work or aren't thrilled about a chore you've been given, you can talk to God. You can ask him to help you to do your best. You can ask him to change your attitude towards the work that you're doing!

2. PEOPLE WILL NOTICE THE WAY YOU WORK
Genesis 39:3 says that Potiphar noticed Joseph's work. Even though he was in a lousy situation, he earned an amazing reputation as someone who did his best....and because of that, he got promoted into better positions-- eventually becoming the guy in charge of Potiphar's whole house! This reminds us that when we work hard and do our best, even if we might not really enjoy what we're doing, our hard work and attitudes will be noticed! People will think highly of you!

I shared about how, when I was a teenager, I worked at Canadian Tire and earned a reputation of being a hard worker who could be trusted (unlike the person who would find a secret place in the warehouse to sleep through his whole shift). Because of the reputation that I earned, I was trusted to work overnight when nobody else was around, they continued to hire me back every summer, and the owner of the store even thanked me personally, knowing that I was someone who did my best because I loved and followed Jesus. Having a reputation of being a hard worker is something that will benefit you your whole life....and it can start right now with the way you work at school or the way you help around the house.

3. WE CAN WORK AS WORSHIP
Ephesians 3:23 says that we should work at everything we do with all of our hearts as if we were working for the Lord. This reminds us that we can work as worship! Worship refers to anything that we do that shows that we love God. That could mean singing songs in church, making the right choices in life, showing kindness to someone, or working in a way that would make God proud of you! I shared about a time when I was a custodian in a church building that had a Montessori school, so there were 70-80 preschoolers using the building every day. There were days when I dreaded going into clean the washroom. I remember times when I would be sitting in my office when a teacher would ask me to go clean up the mess after a child threw up. It definitely wasn't a glamorous job. But, I made a decision. Instead of grumbling and complaining and hating the work I had to do, I decided to do my very best as if Jesus himself had asked me to do it! When I did that work (no matter how disgusting it was) as worship, I found that it was a lot easier. It was far less painful. In fact, I even ENJOYED doing it! Whether it's schoolwork, chores around the house, or cleaning the bathrooms at McDonalds at your very first job, you can do those things as worship! You can do those things as if Jesus himself asked you to do them! You might even find that you'll work even harder and actually come to enjoy those "dirty jobs"...because you're doing those things as worship to God.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS FOR HOME

1. Parents, share a story of a "dirty job" that you once had to do. Talk about how you did your very best and did your work as worship. You can even share about a time when you got fired for not being a hard worker if that's applicable.

2. Remind your teen that EVERYONE has to do things that they might not enjoy. That might mean schoolwork, chores around the house, or working at a "dirty job", but that if we have a reputation of being a hard worker and doing our best, that's something that will benefit us in the future.

3. Is there something at school, at home, or at a job that your teen is finding really difficult and stressful? Take the time to pray for your teen, asking God to help them to do their best and to work hard when they might not feel like it.

BACK 2 SCHOOL SURVIVAL GUIDE- PART 1 (Sept 14, 2018)

For our fall kick-off at CATALYST, we started a new series called BACK 2 SCHOOL SURVIVAL GUIDE. This week, we took a closer look at the events of Daniel Chapter One. In this chapter, four teenagers had their city attacked by enemies and then were kidnapped and brought to Babylon.  These teens grew up loving and following God, but now they were in a foreign culture where NOBODY else shared their faith or values.

While in Babylon, they were enrolled in a "high school" that would train them to be servants for the king. At this high school, they faced a lot of pressure to conform and be like everybody else. They had their names changed, which was significant because all of their names reminded them of their faith. For example, Daniel's name means "God is Just" and his friend Hananiah's name meant "God is full of love and grace". The new names they were given all paid tribute to the idols the Babylonian's worshipped (Daniel became Beltechazzar- meaning "Bel protects his life", Hananiah's name was changed to Shadrach- meaning "Commanded by Aku"). Their names were changed so that they wouldn't be reminded of their old way of life and so that they would leave their faith behind them.

These four teens experienced even more pressure when they were expected to eat whatever the King gave them, and most of the food that was served was considered "unclean". In Bible times, food was considered "unclean" either for health reasons (to prevent disease from spreading) or because it had been used as sacrifices to false gods. Daniel and his friends REFUSED to eat the food and only ate a diet of veggies and water for 10 days. Even though they didn't eat the king's food, miraculously, they were found to be stronger, wiser, and better than anyone else in the school. This even impressed the king, who gave them important positions in his kingdom.

This Bible story reminded of our teens of the importance of resisting the pressures that they might face in school. At school, teens are surrounded by others who don't share their faith or values and might encourage them to do things that aren't right. They might feel pressured to do what everyone else is doing just to be accepted (from gossiping and being mean to others to experimenting with drugs). Here, Daniel and his friends stood firm against the pressures they faced and refused to do what they knew wasn't right. As a result of this, God took care of them and helped them! This reminds us that there is always great value when we follow God. When we're committed to doing the right thing and following His directions for living (even when nobody else is) he will help us and be with us, just like he was for these four teens in the Bible.

DISCUSSION QUESTION FOR HOME

Talk to your teen about what some of their biggest challenges are at school, Is it school work? Finding good friends? Resisting pressure? Take the time to pray with them and ask God to help them this year at school.