Last week, we started a new two-part series called EYES & EARS where we talked about making GOOD (OR RIGHT) choices when it comes to what we watch or what we listen to! This is a pretty important topic because technology has made it INCREDIBLY easy and convenient to watch or listen to whatever we want at the click of a button…and most of it is COMPLETELY FREE!
It has never been easier to watch porn, to watch movies full of graphic violence, disturbing images, or insane amounts of swearing. It’s never been easier to listen to music or watch videos that might be full of TERRIBLE messages! For most of us, we carry around the power to choose in our pockets!
1. MEDIA DOES INFLUENCE YOU
In 1 Corinthians 15:33, it contains a pretty famous saying, “BAD COMPANY CORRUPTS GOOD CHARACTER.” It means that when you hang out with the wrong kind of people, you’ll start being influenced to do the wrong kinds of things. That’s not just true when it comes to the friends we choose---but it’s the same with the stuff we choose to watch or listen to--- if we’re watching or listening to stuff that isn’t that good, it can CORRUPT US! It can affect us in negative ways! It can even lead us to sin (to make choices that are the opposite of what God wants for us) and distance us from God!
It’s amazing how the stuff we surround ourselves with can influence us! I shared a story of how when I worked at Canadian Tire in the parts department, everyday I dealt with customers who were angry and complaining because they had to buy parts to fix their car. And do you know what? After working there for awhile, I noticed that it started to affect my behaviour—where I was less patient and more angry and irritable--- where I would even snap at my friends! The attitudes of complete strangers were affecting me in bad ways just because I was around it all the time!
It’s amazing how the stuff we surround ourselves with can influence us! I shared a story of how when I worked at Canadian Tire in the parts department, everyday I dealt with customers who were angry and complaining because they had to buy parts to fix their car. And do you know what? After working there for awhile, I noticed that it started to affect my behaviour—where I was less patient and more angry and irritable--- where I would even snap at my friends! The attitudes of complete strangers were affecting me in bad ways just because I was around it all the time!
It's not just people-- the things we think about and spend our time with can also influence us! Now that doesn’t mean that if we watch violent movies, we might go out and kill somebody….but scientific studies HAVE proven that watching violent stuff can affect our outlook on life, our attitudes, and it can even desensitize us to real violence! If you watch stuff that’s full of swearing....you might find that seeping into your own language! If you listen to music that’s misogynistic (which means that it has messages that treats women like objects, uses hateful language to describe women—a lot of rap/hiphop culture is full of it), that might influence how a guy treats girls or might teach girls that it's normal behaviour to expect from boys. If you spend your time reading and responding to ANGRY trollish comments online…eventually your comments will be more ANGRY! If you watch porn, it can mess with your expectations of what a REAL relationship is like—and it can lead you to OBJECTIFY and DEHUMANIZE real people! Scientific studies are constantly coming out warning how dangerous it is! If you’re listening to music that communicates the message that getting wasted, experimenting with drugs, or sleeping around is great, those ideas DO seep into your own values the more you immerse yourself in them!
2. FREEDOM TO CHOOSE
In the Book of Corinthians, it says- “You say, “I am allowed to do anything”—but not everything is good for you. You say, “I am allowed to do anything”—but not everything is beneficial.”
What that verse is getting at is that God has given us the freedom to make our own choices in life! God doesn’t force anyone to follow him! He didn’t create robots programmed to do the right thing without any ability to choose! We all have the freedom and ability to do whatever we want! But that doesn’t meant that all of our choices are good and beneficial for us or others! God wants us to seriously think about what we watch and what we listen to, and make the HARD choice to do what’s right!
To give you an example--- a friend of mine asked if I was watching a particular show on NETFLIX, and I told him that I heard that it was full of a lot of violence and swearing…and he said to me, “Well, you’re an adult! You can watch whatever you want!”. When he said that—the above verse just popped into my head--- “Yeah, I have the FREEDOM and ABILITY to watch whatever I want, but that doesn’t mean that it’s right or it’s a GOOD thing!”
EVERDAY you will face choices to press “play”, and you have the FREEDOM to do it! Nobody will stop you! But that doesn’t mean that it’s a good thing! That doesn’t mean that it’s something God will be super proud of! That doesn’t mean that it won’t influence you in a negative way! God has given us the FREEDOM to choose! He’s given us the FREEDOM to do whatever we want! But he’s also given us some directions in the Bible--- to help us make WISE and HEALTHY choices.
3. TAKE DRASTIC MEASURES
Making wise decisions about what you watch and listen to can be really hard. It means imposing limits on yourself! And doing that might make people think that you’re totally crazy and weird! You might stand out! People might make fun of you for it (just like my friend thought it was ridiculous that I wouldn’t watch a particular show on Netflix even though I’m old enough to watch it). Following Jesus and doing the right thing when nobody else really cares about God or shares your values can be super hard. Doing the right thing is usually never easy!
Here are some helpful tips that might help you make better media choices:
CHECK OUT THE LYRICS
I’ve made a habit of checking out the lyrics whenever I’m interested in listening/buying a song or an album…and you know what, when some of my FAVOURITE BANDS put out music, I’m really tempted to overlook what they say because it sounds so good…but I have to ask myself if it’s something I could sing along to if my kids were in the car, or if the message/values in the song conflicts with my own beliefs/values. That doesn’t mean that it has to be Christian music or worship music (although I’ve been listening to a lot more of that in the last few years), but just something that doesn’t conflict with my Christian faith! Like I said last week, the #1 song on iTunes WAS “7 Rings by Ariana Grande” (it’s now #3! Yay!) with the message that the most important thing in life is how hot and rich you are!
The current #1 is Lady Gaga’s SHALLOW—which actually has really cool lyrics about being tired of living an empty/meaningless life! As a Christian, parts of the song even sound like a prayer where she’s asking if there’s more to life than this!
There are some songs that have weird or perplexing lyrics where the message isn’t that straightforward—and you’ll have to make the call about whether it’s something worth listening to- for example-the #2 song is Billy Eilish’ “Bury a Friend”. There are parts of that song that seem really interesting and deep (where she seems to be questioning what happens when we die), but then OVER AND OVER again she sings, “I WANNA END ME”. Even if she’s making some deep statement, do you think it’s good if I’m singing “I WANNA END ME” over and over? Do you think that’s a good song for some of your friends to listen to? Probably not!
Check those lyrics out! Google has made it SUPER EASY!
VIEW THE RATINGS/CONTENT ADVISORY
In the same way—whenever I’m thinking of watching a movie, there’s a few things I do. First of all, I check out the movie rating. If it’s R or 18A, then the odds are that it’s NOT all that great to watch. Another tip is to visit a movie page on IMDB and click on VIEW CONTENT ADVISORY. It can sometimes be spoilery, so don’t read the details too closely, but it actually breaks down what the content is like in the movie! Each movie is separated into sections like "Sex/Nudity" and "Violence" and right underneath it will tell you if the content is mild, moderate, or extreme. If you’re seeing “EXTREME” or “HEAVY” in those sections, it might be a good idea to skip the movie!
USE RESTRICTIONS/PARENT CONTROLS
This is a super healthy tip. Tell your mom or dad that you want to make sure that what you’re watching/listening to is good, and get them to set up the RESTRICTIONS or PARENT CONTROLS on your phone or tablet!
I realize that sounds completely crazy, because it means that you're WILLINGLY giving up your freedom and making it difficult to watch whatever you want, but it's a really smart thing to do when trying to navigate the minefield of the Internet- I mean, not even Google Image Search is safe! On pretty much all devices, you can filter the ratings of the music you’ll listen to, the apps you’ll use, or more importantly, the websites you visit! As a full-grown adult, my wife set up the restrictions on all of my devices (and it has a password that I don't know). Why? Because it helps me to avoid situations where I might click on something that isn’t right…AND it also shows my family that I want to be accountable for what I do online! On my computers, I even have accountability software installed, so if I were to visit a questionable website, it doesn't block it, but it sends the links in an email to my wife (who I've chosen as my accountability partner).
TIP FOR HOME
TIP FOR HOME
Parents, do you have filters, accountability software or parent controls set up on devices at home or ones that your teens use? If not, now is a pretty great time to start. (Email me if you want some recommendations). Talk to your teens about why it's helpful to have restrictions placed on what they view.
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